It's a nightmare to come home after a long meeting in school only to find a flying cockroach hanging around the lift lobby. Worst still, it was hanging out near the doors of one of the lifts. My steps which were fast and furious till I sighted this monstrosity, retarded to a light and controlled feet shuffle. No way was I going to snap it out of it's zen-looking crawl and send it into the night skies.

I circled the pest; my eyes tirelessly darting from it to the lift button. I reached out and depressed the button. On this tense night, even the usually soft and mellow bell sounded like a sharp, piercing scream. Thankfully, the beast was still unperturbed. 2 swift steps and I was in the lift. Muscle memory from all these years meant I could press both the buttons to my floor and the 'close' without even taking a glance. The lift doors were closing, I made it.

But no, as the doors were closing I heard the incoming sound of a bicycle chain. A woman cycled through the lift lobby and startled the unassuming roach.

This must have went through the prick's mind.

"Mayday, mayday! We have reports of enemy incoming. Need a safe place to hide. Oh wait, look there's a lift to hide in!"

The next third of a minute in the lift was my worst lift-ride ever. My bag and my free arm was everywhere. Every inch of air around me was being swished in the hope of keeping that gross creature off me. The doors opened and I emerged.

I had kept the desperate bug off me. I was victorious.