holla

ok, just had this super crazy and fun msn convo with all my TPJC buddies...
i mean, yeah, some of them there arent in tpjc now la..
but then again, it felt the same...
like all of us, sitting in the round table in the canteen..
just talking crap and killing time....
yeah, TPJC style...
haha, memories eh...
all the fun and laughter...
its just something that i cant manage to let the sands of time wash away...
i dont want them to end, yet i know, that i myself ended it.

the moment i left TPJC out of my choices, i knew...it has ended, at that time i was bent on leaving that school..
i knew i'd miss the people, but HEY, i thought it wont be so bad..
but now, i really get the full extent of it...
i miss my VS boys the most, its still heartbreaking to think all the way from sec1, to graduation day...
all the times, that i wished would never end...
yet they did...i had no control over that...
but now..
i chose to leave the place, and go to some place alien to me...
TPJC has easterners...
people im so accustomed to being around with..
be it TKGS, DHS, St Pats, Ngee Ann or AHS...
most importantly VS GUYS…
but it feels comfortable...
i dont know why..
when i stepped into CJ...
its all convent uniforms, all boys mission schools, or people from northern school...
where's the easterners?
i grew up there...
i studied there, be it pasir ris primary or VS..
but now, i just left...
leaving the cradle of comfort, and venturing into the unknowns...
i know, there is no way i can be in the east forever, but is it too early now?

will i fit into cj as well as i had fitted into tpjc...
its a question thats waiting to be answered...
and till then i'll dread the answer...
will i think of march 9th and regret giving up SP for CJ?
or will i think of feb 12 and regret not putting TPJC into the JAE choices?
i dont know, its something that time will unravel.

i really miss tpjc...
i really do..
as much as i call it the Green Dustbin...
as much as i hated it so much that i didnt even wear the badge for the whole 2months...
despite the fact that i'll never miss it as much as VS
i love the place...
my DM used to say, "a school is as good as its students..."
and i loved the students...
mr maran...why didnt i consider that?

weird huh...
ask me now, i'll still tell you i rather go poly then TPJC...
but deep within me, when the heart and not the mind thinks...
i'll take TPJC in my fist and clench it close to my heart...
regrets regrets...
but life goes on...
the broken glass cant be fixed, neither can the spilt milk be saved...
it has happened...and all im left with is confused regrets..

i never felt like this when i chose VS...
i knew, it was the one school for me..
and i knew the moment i stepped in it, that i would never regret any moment spent there..
but now, i cant feel the same for CJ...
intuition tickling me?
i can go on and on, but i guess i already committed my immediate future to CJC...

ok...i am off...